Friday, February 29, 2008

Garden Photos

Interfaith Rally on the Go

Early this morning, I readied myself for my check up in Manila. However, the morning news showed that some roads were closed and classes were suspended in anticipation for the big protest set today against the Arroyo administration.

Since I was not in shape to face today’s adversity, I opted to cancel my doctor’s appointment and decided instead to just take a rest.

Clad in long shirt, pajamas and socks, I was on bed the whole day wrapped with comforter still burning with on and off fever. But, as usual it didn’t stop me from updating myself with what’s happening in Manila. With my inhaler stuff in my nose, I’ve kept myself posted with events that might overthrow the current government by watching TV.

I was amazed with the throng of protesters marching in the streets. It seems that Filipinos are about to make another history of People Power 3. Thousands joined and though the police tried to put barricades in some roads it didn’t stop the group to multiply in number.

Most of those present are youth shouting for truth. They walked out from their schools which did not suspend classes. Former presidents Cory Aquino and Joseph Estrada also participated in the said mass actions.

The different groups converge in Ninoy Aquino monument. I wonder why not in Edsa which was a historical place where peaceful revolution was held that toppled two administrations- Marcos and Estrada.

The Arroyo government is in big dilemma because of controversies that surround the China ZTE Broadband Deal. It was later on worsened with Jun Lozada’s expose’ about bribery and corruption involving the first couple and other top government officials.

Last February 19, MalacaƱang palace held the Unity Walk participated in by cabinet officials to show their support to the Arroyo administration. It was sort of affirmation that the members of the president’s government remain loyal to her.

The search for truth and accountability continues. With all the things going on now, it makes me wonder if the president will make it this time. She has been through a lot of controversies since she took over the office from the ousted former president Estrada.

From the legitimacy of her presidency to alleged cheating in election and now this issue involving her and the first seems that her hands are full catching stones being thrown by oppositions.

Like a wounded animal, the fiercer she becomes. Having been called “evil” by Neri and “bitch” by a congressman, she remains tough in her speeches. The air of authority remains and there is that silent confidence as if saying, “This too shall pass”.

If only the witnesses are not being backed up by people who are against the government and really clean morally (Lozada can not answer if indeed he has another family), maybe I’ll be joining too in the street. But, one must not judge easily for those who cast stones are obviously sinners as well.

I pray for my country not to anybody else hoping this too she would survive.

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Thursday, February 28, 2008

Sick, Tired, and Depressed

I am sick…yeah, right. I got infected with bugs.

My throat hurts, my eyes are red and watery, my feet are cold and clammy and practically all the cells of my body are throbbing with pain.

By mid- afternoon yesterday, my fever was 39.5 degree Celsius that I felt like my skin was being pierced with hot needles. I was reminded of the exact feelings I had right after my surgery last June. When another bag of blood for transfusion was attached to one of my IV’s, I felt like the pain skyrocketed when my fever broke to 40 degree Celsius.

It was a long battle with countless injections for skin tests and later on being administered with antibiotics thru endless needle pricks. I was shaking uncontrollably that I thought it would be my end already. Well, thankfully I survived.

My only consolation yesterday was I didn’t go through the same torment with endless shots from nurses and doctors. I wrapped myself with double comforter and took lots of fluids to help my aching throat then finally I drifted off to sleep.

The fever was on and off that I succumbed again to self- pitying.

After sleeping for almost the whole afternoon, I woke up still feeling worst. My eyes were so red that I got scared staring at them. The power of the almighty bugs…

When the girls arrived from school, I could hardly talk because my voice sounded like a croaking crow. Yeah, that bad.

I opted to stay in the room and ate there my dinner. Well, I could hardly swallow the food. Everything tasted like medicine…and I abhor it because it has been my companion for many months now.

My whole system crumbled that it feels like I’m falling again in a shady crater of pain and agony. So bad…

Like a good patient that I am, I avoided computer for as long as I could so as not to cause too much strain with my red eyes. I was able to bear ignoring the computer only the whole day yesterday and last night. That explains why I wasn't able to write anything for the blog.

However, it seems like the lure of computer is so strong that here I am again hitting the keyboard with all my might.

I missed Friendster, Blogspot, Bloglogs, Infowars, and other sites. So, I’m trying another medication now…the “drugnet” of the cyberspace. Maybe it’ll do the magic of healing.

Kidding aside, the past days felt like a horrible nightmare. My whole body was aching and in deep longing to be healed. In addition, the purplish bruise on my arm which was the result of regular laboratory tests the other day was also shouting for my attention.

I squirted fountain of virus all over the room by endless sneezing. So you could just imagine how painful my throat was with the efforts I needed to exert in spraying the power of the bugs. They owe me a lot for this.

Getting sick usually brings me this unspeakable desperation for being indisposed. I loathe the feeling of being unproductive…not that I am really prolific now. After all, I’ve been out of work for many months already after getting seriously ill early last year.

I hope the reign of the bugs won’t last for long. I can only sustain their clout for a short time. They didn’t give me a notice before invading my body…

Just like everything that happened in my life, this illness is beyond my control. It only proves that I am human…I can’t tell what will happen next in my future.

Let it be…the sun will shine soon and bath me with a new dawn of a healthy life. 

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

How a Six-Year-Old Dealt with Pain

My six-year-old niece was grief-stricken…

It was barely two weeks since I last saw her weeping like it’s already the end of Cartoon Network. That’s the time that she was nursing a broken heart because of breaking up with her puppy love, six-year-old Kurt.

It took me one hour in the church before I finished explaining everything she needed to know about love and relationship. By the end of the mass that fateful Sunday, we agreed that she’ll have her next boyfriend at the age of 30.

Last night, another pivotal event happened in her life. You see, she lost something very significant. So special that the dam of tears burst out until such time I feared that the entire house might be flooded already.

She lost for the second time her front tooth. Have a glimpse… 

Her agony started around 3 p.m. in the afternoon after eating her favorite chocolates. The tooth dangled loose but she wouldn’t let anybody touch it. Finally by dinner time, her precious tooth gave up and was detached permanently.

She was sobbing frenziedly and mumbling incoherently while wrapping her dear tooth in a paper. For a very long time she was in grave mourning that I didn’t know how to console her sorrowful heart.

Finally, she fell asleep with tears trickling down her cheeks. I thought she’ll wake up feeling much better but I was wrong. 

She woke up hunting for her tooth which unfortunately was incidentally thrown out by the helper. The dam of tears opened up again until such time her mom called in the phone to listen to her endless rambling of the pitiful tooth.

Later on, I needed to use my stock knowledge of convincing power in persuading her to go to school with the missing tooth in front. Shayne wasn’t much of a help. She made the matter worst with nonstop teases by making funny faces.

When she arrived this afternoon, she was the same Trisha. Laughing uproariously and dancing wildly while imitating the Kung Fu kids in the TV. 

As I pondered this evening what happened to Trisha, I couldn’t help but to wonder how many of us suffered like her because of losing something very dear in our heart.

For her, the only outlet of pain she knows is crying. As we grow old, we look up at crying as a sign of weakness not of healing.

After long bawling, Trisha ended up relieved with anguish. For grown ups, we seldom lose something without being painfully scarred. Could it be because we have a tendency to forget that everything is ephemeral? Nothing lasts forever… only change remains the same.

How I wish that each one of us would be left with some child like credence in our hearts…that stance where we can let go after one last cry…

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Monday, February 25, 2008

Shayne Vs Trisha

On the left corner wearing white bugs bunny shirt and shorts, I.Q. 1000 (I just guessed coz she talks and reasons out like a 60 year-old woman and she’s the only six-year-old girl I know who can spell words with closed eyes, watches CNN news and very interested in politics), the next president of the Philippines, smart aleck number one…Trisha.

On the right corner wearing pink blouse and tight leggings, computer and IPOD addict, certified “friends” with her countless contact in Friendster, Toni Gonzaga fanatic, the next top model in town, smart aleck number two…Shayne.

Yesterday was such a long day for me. I mean really looooooong. Why? It was the Bugs’ Day.

The two kids bugged me the whole day and drove me on the verge of insanity with their bantering of words, sticking out of tongues and endless squabbles.

With their running nose because of bad cough and colds, the two brawled like cat and dog. Now, could it be because they were being attacked with cold bugs that made them uncontrollable yesterday?

I really have no idea but I knew that I was about to strangle them with my bare hands many times. I implored all the help of the countless saints I knew by begging for their mercy to grant me the endurance I needed to last the day.

Trisha pestered Shayne with her funny faces and her roaring laughter. Shayne on the other hand irritated Trisha by teasing her with her missing front tooth. Both good in annoying each other with anything (and I mean everything) that they could think of just for the sake of making each other ill-tempered.

Ending? Each one would come to me asking me to reprimand whoever.

The time to hear mass finally came (Thank God!). The two excitedly prepared and dressed while making fun with each other.

In the church, I was expecting them to be quiet just like they usually do whenever we hear mass. However, it wasn’t the end yet of my misery.

I was in between of them but they would glance at each other to make funny faces. Shayne would make fun of Trisha’s hair while Trisha would imitate the odd way Shayne sits. They would mumble incorrigible words still irking each other.

In addition, Trisha would look around the church looking for her ex- boyfriend. (She’s the only kid that I only know too who had a boyfriend at six and broken hearted after a week.)

As the mass came to an end, the bugs’ adrenaline finally wears off. Shayne's head was on my right shoulder while Trisha’s was on my left.

Finally, my angels were back…(sighs)

How did I survive? Simple…thousands of inhales and exhales. The result? Long tolerance. After all, patience is a virtue.

(Note: Shayne and Trisha are both my nieces entrusted under my care by their parents)

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