Saturday, February 16, 2008

Continuously Surviving the Storm of My Life

It has been a windy day and though windows were tightly closed cold still seeped through my body. I then seek warmth from the thick comforter on the bed in the cozy room while reading a book.

Later on, my mobile phone beside me caught my attention. It has been quite a while since I checked on it so I decided to delete some messages. What I read in the folders and archives pinched my heart with evocative memories.

I was overwhelmed with messages from people close to my heart since the very day my affliction started because of my illness. They were words of motivation, wisdom and love.

There were moments in my life that I was plagued with thoughts that I was alone in my malady. I was very wrong. Reading those messages made me realized that I have never fought my battle alone.

Family and friends wept and prayed for me. They flooded me with comfort in ways they could. What did I do to deserve overflowing love from them?

Most of the messages still dated back about nine months ago. I was amazed with the transformation- from grief when I first found out I was sick, prayers and encouragement when I was in the hospital, inspiration while I was recuperating, joy as slowly I have surpassed the trials and jubilance as my heart found the answer to all my sufferings.

Soon, I would face another facet of my life…

It has been a long journey but I know that the end is not yet in sight. After all, life is an endless channel of wonderful discoveries, trials and tribulations.

However, before I continue my trek towards the future I would like to remember some of the people who had been special part in my travel especially those who steered me with loving hands while I was in the dark tunnel.

Perhaps, the person who inspired me the most aside from my family was Teacher Charie. She was like a sister who never failed to make me feel better after I finished my laboratory tests.

She would send me long messages explaining that there’s a purpose for everything. She did not hesitate to be with me during the time I was admitted in the hospital for my operation, held my hand and wiped my tears after enduring painful injections and examinations.

She told me that she would be willing to endure the difficulty on my behalf if only it were possible. She and her daughter Pao told me with strong conviction that soon they would see me back in Naga healthy and free from infirmity.

Teacher Alpe, touched me in unimaginable ways. It was with her that I would send long emails explaining in details how my spirit was being torn apart and my hope was collapsing. She wept bitter tears and told me many times to hold on.

Since the day I left school, she never failed to send me messages urging me to be brave and continue fighting. She would update me of school activities to make me feel that I will always be part of the NPS family.

My best friend, Tintin, called me many times saying over and over again, “Kaya mo yan, ika pa”. It was her daughter’s singing voice which cheered me while I was alone outside of the house crying on the night of my birthday that I was told I might die in the OR.

My coordinator, Teacher Tess, assured me that they were storming heaven with prayers for my recovery. It was her message that brought tears to my eyes a day after my surgery telling me she just offered the Sunday mass for me.

Joy, Rica, Shiela, Joanne, Aiz, Jazz, Dolly, Bem, Jannie, Jean, Jinky, Ning, Jun, Jay, Eds, Trece, Mam Fati, Teacher Susan, Teacher Nancy, Teacher Agnes, Teacher Hazel, Teacher Ignas, Nangnang, Sir Mars, Teacher Ditas and the rest of my co teachers and former pupils (specially Krysostom, Marc and Thomas) who all sent me words of comfort, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I have chosen to trail a different path this time but I know that there would always be a special corner in my heart that all of you will occupy. I am very thankful that I became part for many years of the NPS Family where I have experienced many changes.

From that shy young lady fresh from college, I have emerged into a confident woman ready to embark in another step of ladder of success. I know it won’t be easy…but the memories are enough to keep me going…

…away from my second home but memoirs are close to my heart…ad infinitum.

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