Faith is the sole driving force with which things deemed
impossible become feasible. The lack of it cannot be attested to a weak belief
but merely an affirmation of our human frailties.
To say that my faith has never faltered would be a lie. Many
times, I found myself grappling for control as my faith slowly crumbled.
However, it was also in faith that I have found the strength to hope that
things will happen in accordance with His will.
My 2015 was welcomed with a test of faith when I first talked
about getting married. Majority of what I heard was dissuasion and utter
disbelief in what David and I were about to do. I was disheartened but remained
steadfast with my conviction to do what I felt was right. They said it was too
early. David and I answered, we were too in love.
When we started the process, we realized it would be
impossible to get married here in Jakarta because of so many requirements.
Neither could I go home and get married there since I needed to stay for ten
days and I could not leave school for that long. Still, he was so sure we would
be able to get married. I asked for the help of a friend since they know some
pastors (Only Religious ceremony is allowed here). In turn, my friend asked
another friend. We were unaware that ‘friend’ she asked actually lived in the
same building of the apartment that David rented. Coincidence or not, the rest
is history. She and her husband took care of our counseling schedule, the
church, and our baptism.
But, my faith started to waver again when four days before my
wedding, I have not received yet my papers from the Philippines. We could not
book the hotel for reception nor we could confirm the invitations. Three days
before the wedding, my papers were delivered in school but it would be too late
to bring in Philippine embassy. The following day Thursday, I finally got to
bring my papers in the embassy with a sad news. I would be able to get it
Monday. I frantically begged for it to be released the following day since our
wedding was Saturday. Apparently, God really wanted the wedding to push through
because my papers were released a day before the wedding. We bought my wedding
dress Friday night and booked the hotel Friday afternoon. Thanks to some friends
who stayed and prayed with us during the difficult process.
That magical moment when everything ceased to exist and I was
only aware of my husband’s gaze will forever be embedded in my heart. When I
saw his tears, I thought of how his faith helped us to be strong. On that day,
I felt everyone’s happiness for us. On that day, I saw how our faith helped us
to make our dream a reality. When he enveloped me with his arms, I was reminded
of how faith can move mountains.
Perhaps, it was also that faith which helped us to be
stronger as we faced the daily struggle of the long battle to finish the
processing of my papers so we could be together. When one of us starts to break
down, one remains strong.
Nine months after our marriage, my husband and I celebrated
our first Christmas and New Year as a married couple- about ten thousand miles
far from each other.
It’s probably the saddest thing that could ever happen to a
husband and a wife who just tied the knot. When the dawn of realization finally
hit us that we wouldn’t be able to spend the holiday as planned, we were both
devastated. The circumstances were doubly hard for me since I have never spent
Christmas or New Year away from home.
The celebrations were definitely different this year. My
husband and I had two Christmases and New Years together- his and mine at
different side of the world. During Christmas while my husband was reading a
Bible verse from Daily Bread, we finally broke down. The heart is hard to
console when faith is at its lowest point. But, God has held our hands for too
long so we took comfort knowing that.
When we ended year 2015, my husband and I both uttered a
prayer. We know that we don’t have control of how long or what other
difficulties we might encounter before we could be together. Faith however
whispered to us, so long as we believe, it will happen. Fate made us as one and
faith will bring us together...to infinity and beyond.