Faith is the sole driving force with which things deemed impossible become feasible. The lack of it cannot be attested to a weak belief but merely an affirmation of our human frailties.
To say that my faith has never faltered would be a lie. Many times, I found myself grappling for control as my faith slowly crumbled. However, it was also in faith that I have found the strength to hope that things will happen in accordance with His will.
My 2015 was welcomed with a test of faith when I first talked about getting married. Majority of what I heard was dissuasion and utter disbelief in what David and I were about to do. I was disheartened but remained steadfast with my conviction to do what I felt was right. They said it was too early. David and I answered, we were too in love.
When we started the process, we realized it would be impossible to get married here in Jakarta because of so many requirements. Neither could I go home and get married there since I needed to stay for ten days and I could not leave school for that long. Still, he was so sure we would be able to get married. I asked for the help of a friend since they know some pastors (Only Religious ceremony is allowed here). In turn, my friend asked another friend. We were unaware that ‘friend’ she asked actually lived in the same building of the apartment that David rented. Coincidence or not, the rest is history. She and her husband took care of our counseling schedule, the church, and our baptism.
But, my faith started to waver again when four days before my wedding, I have not received yet my papers from the Philippines. We could not book the hotel for reception nor we could confirm the invitations. Three days before the wedding, my papers were delivered in school but it would be too late to bring in Philippine embassy. The following day Thursday, I finally got to bring my papers in the embassy with a sad news. I would be able to get it Monday. I frantically begged for it to be released the following day since our wedding was Saturday. Apparently, God really wanted the wedding to push through because my papers were released a day before the wedding. We bought my wedding dress Friday night and booked the hotel Friday afternoon. Thanks to some friends who stayed and prayed with us during the difficult process.
That magical moment when everything ceased to exist and I was only aware of my husband’s gaze will forever be embedded in my heart. When I saw his tears, I thought of how his faith helped us to be strong. On that day, I felt everyone’s happiness for us. On that day, I saw how our faith helped us to make our dream a reality. When he enveloped me with his arms, I was reminded of how faith can move mountains.
Perhaps, it was also that faith which helped us to be stronger as we faced the daily struggle of the long battle to finish the processing of my papers so we could be together. When one of us starts to break down, one remains strong.
Nine months after our marriage, my husband and I celebrated our first Christmas and New Year as a married couple- about ten thousand miles far from each other.
It’s probably the saddest thing that could ever happen to a husband and a wife who just tied the knot. When the dawn of realization finally hit us that we wouldn’t be able to spend the holiday as planned, we were both devastated. The circumstances were doubly hard for me since I have never spent Christmas or New Year away from home.
The celebrations were definitely different this year. My husband and I had two Christmases and New Years together- his and mine at different side of the world. During Christmas while my husband was reading a Bible verse from Daily Bread, we finally broke down. The heart is hard to console when faith is at its lowest point. But, God has held our hands for too long so we took comfort knowing that.
When we ended year 2015, my husband and I both uttered a prayer. We know that we don’t have control of how long or what other difficulties we might encounter before we could be together. Faith however whispered to us, so long as we believe, it will happen. Fate made us as one and faith will bring us together...to infinity and beyond.