Friday, July 27, 2018

How We Survived a Long Distance Relationship

Long distance relationship is not for a faint heart. Humans are wired for instant gratification and the thought of not seeing or not being able to talk to the person you love is a difficult struggle to bear.
Long distance relationship is not for a faint heart. Humans are wired for instant gratification and the thought of not seeing or not being able to talk to the person you love is a difficult struggle to bear.
relationship advice reddit
During our simple wedding at Jakarta.
Long distance relationship is not for a faint heart. Humans are wired for instant gratification and the thought of not seeing or not being able to talk to the person you love is a difficult struggle to bear.

Skype or Facebook messenger may not totally diminish the pain of separation but you can use it to build a strong foundation for your relationship. After all, it is known that people in long distance relationship have deeper and more meaningful communications. David and I were separated thousands of miles before finally seeing each other in person and more years of separation after getting married and processing our papers. It was through video calls and messages that we were able to work on establishing a stronger relationship.

Don’t doubt your love. Second-guessing decisions will weaken both of your will. What kills long distance relationship is the constant underlying ambiguity or irrational expectations. David and I had the same vision since we first talked. We knew that our goal for the future is to grow old together. This helped us surpassed all the struggles that we faced.

Don’t listen to skepticism. You have no responsibility to explain your choices in life and that includes your relationship. It is complicated enough for two people in love. People who surround you are merely spectators wishing for you to succeed or hoping for you to fail. When I married my husband, so many people expressed their doubts and indignation. But, marrying my bestfriend is the best thing that I have ever done. Cliche as it may sound, listen to what your heart says.

Live in love and hope. A long distance relationship without hope will not live. Eventually, the excitement will die. I remember that from the first day we started talking until the last day we were separated, the level of excitement whenever we talked was the same. I would wake up 4:00 a.m. to be able to talk to him before work and he would do the same thing. Thousands of messages, hundreds of phone calls, and endless conversations kept our relationship strong.

Communicate from your Heart. Be open about your feelings. Spoken words are important since it’s hard to read body signals if you are thousand miles from each other. Explain your fears, insecurities, and reasons for jealousy. Love thrives in honesty.

There is no secret formula to make sure that long distance relationship works. However, my husband and I can assure you that all the tears, all the pains, and all the difficulties are definitely worth it. The day I came here to the United States to be reunited with him is the best thing that ever happened to me. His tight hug and tears of happiness affirmed a deep commitment to our future and to a love which is to infinity and beyond.


32 comments:

  1. Me and my boyfriend survived a 3 year LDR and we have closed the distance 2 years ago ,still staying strong now. Definitely very relatable with your advice!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ah, I can't imagine this! The longest my partner and I have been away is about 3 months and it already sucked. I'll keep this in mind next time, thank you so much!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Me and my wife started as a long distance relationship but we lived together now and couldn’t be happier

    ReplyDelete
  4. Me and my hubby started out long distance. It's HARD but so worth it when the day comes that you can be together!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yes, agree all your tips and definitely with "Don't doubt your love". Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  6. You are so right you must always honour your feelings and speak from your heart! Good advice. Thanks for sharing! Rach

    ReplyDelete
  7. nancy_ycnanOctober 02, 2018

    Thank you very much for such useful information! I feel that I shall be benefitted and my friends will be benefitted!

    ReplyDelete
  8. This was great hun. Your writing is beautiful. I look forward to read more from you.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Great post.... Im in LDR relationship now and this is great help.....

    ReplyDelete
  10. I can't imagine managing and making a long distance relationship work, great advice though!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I know from my experience that my ex could not handle the distance for a long period of time so to read advice for those who need it is great. Really good post!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I would imagine long distance relationships are difficult. I also know when there is love anything is possible!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Really nice post and kudos for making this happen.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Wow. Nice post. LDR is really a hard scenario to cope with for couples. Thanks for the tips.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Doubting if your loved ones truly care will weaken your relationship with them.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I once was in a long distance relationship, and I think it was super cute, of course I wanted to hang out, but we made it the best of it. We are still good friends, but unfortunately distance did get between us!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Coming from a family whose dad had to go overseas to work for more than 5 years, I can definitely say long distance relationship is not for a faint heart. Both survived though, I guess their love withstood it all. Thanks for sharing this post.

    ReplyDelete
  18. We had a healthy long relationship for 8 years and then got married. Yeah everything you mentioned is must in LDR. More important is trust! Which plays vital role.

    ReplyDelete
  19. A long distance relationship is really not easy. I trial one time, in the end broke up in 3months.

    ReplyDelete
  20. These are great tips! I would also add finding activities to occupy your time while apart. My husband and I spent the first year of our marriage living in different states because of where we were in our careers. It was rough at first, but we did get used to it.

    ReplyDelete
  21. A long distance relationship is never easy but technology in recent years has certainly made it possible to at least see the other person and speak. My first LDR was prior to any of this technology and cell phones. We used land lines to communicate. Hard to believe I know. Great tips for helping survive the LDR.

    ReplyDelete
  22. These long distance relationship tips will surely be helpful to many people. Thanks for sharing your personal experience with us. 😊

    ReplyDelete
  23. Some very good tips. It's not easy to be in a long distance relationship with distractions that may occur on both sides

    ReplyDelete
  24. This is such a good post - you've given great advice. Making use of skype is a great idea, but your last point is so important. People need to communicate how they're feeling properly.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Good communication is so vital to all successful relationships, and that must be so much harder to achieve at a long distance. Helpful, thoughtful suggestions for managing.

    ReplyDelete
  26. I've never been in a long distance relationship. You indeed have some good lessons to take with me. http://www.thecozyme.com

    ReplyDelete
  27. At the beginning of my relationship with my husband, we were separated every other month for a month because he worked in Africa. It was really hard, but I think it’s doable if you have a strong commitment. Sure, being away adds complications, but we managed and 7 years later, we know it was our love that carried us through it.

    ReplyDelete
  28. My daughter fell in love during her college years. After that both her and her boyfriend had jobs in different countries. I was not sure if their relationship would survive the distance, but it did. As you mentioned, it was communication from the heart. After a separation of nearly 4 years they got married. After marriage my daughter still had to stay back in India for a whole year, but they remained steadfast. Being able to trust each other was their secret formula.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I've never been in a long distance relationship but I think those who are in them and are able to withstand everything that comes with it are very strong willed and amazing!

    ReplyDelete
  30. I've never been in a LDR, but I'd like to think that with the dawn of live video messaging, it is much easier than the old days of letters and long distance! The ability to lay eyes and see emotion no doubt makes the relationship feel much more real and involved! Great topic!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Like you said, you owe no one an excuse for your life choices. LDR may be good for one, and bad for the other but you know yourself better. I was in one for one year, and it ended up in marriage that I'm still thankful for till this day.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Long distance relationships are extremely difficult and create unique challenges for couples. Congrats for overcoming those challenges! Your advice is spot on and anyone in a long distance relationship should be reading.

    ReplyDelete

Comment here!

DISCLOSURE:

This site contains links of the affiliate partners and the author/ site owner might earn commission every time you visit the links and/or purchase their products without additional cost to you.

Subscribe by Email

FREE ENGLISH RESOURCES

FREE ENGLISH RESOURCES
Download eBooks, Workbooks, Printables, Essays, and more.

Featured Post

Debunking Ten Golden Rules for a Happy and Successful Marriage

Today, we celebrate our fourth year wedding anniversary. The day I married my husband was the best day of my life. T...

Most Popular Posts