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Friday, November 23, 2007

Facing a Different Storm

Each of us in way or another has an inner battle that we must face. We're lucky if we have faith where our enraged heart could lean while pain gnaw us.

While bleak news about the Super Typhoon Mina continue to dominate the day's bulletin, my heart is livid with a different storm. I went to my regular check-up with my doctor and it seemed that the promise of a healthy life is still elusive within my reach.

It was another frustrating day for me and yet hope continued to live in my heart. My doctor told me that by January, I need to undergo another treatment which entails a regular shot (injection) because the medicine which I need to have has currently no oral medication.

It would simply mean an IV medication.

If I would count the needle pricks I've received with all the procedures I went through, I guess the least number would be a hundred.

Hey, that's life. This is the little "scuffle" of my life. I won't recoil that's definitely for sure!

My doctor asked me, "Napapagod ka na?", of course I do! But then, who am I to complain? Yes, I am the main character of the movie entitled, "My Life," but God is my director and of course I should follow just like any other good actor.

Getting tired is out of the picture. Sooner or later, I would enjoy the runaway success of my movie.

Who knows? I might even enjoy watching it later laughing hilariously while sipping a vodka.

How I wish I could go back to do better.Back to my simple life.Back to my teaching job where I make a difference.I wish I could make a difference again.I wish I could inspire others to trust again.I wish I could understand the senseless pain I'm experiencing.I wish I could go back and do better.I wish I would learn to live with my frustrations.Trying to comprehend human's frailties,I can feel my heart enraged.I can feel my body's pain.I can hear my fear screams.The terror stinks.

Yet, I can't!

Pain and sorrows are all part of life...

Memories should be left behind...

My heart cries but, I can't!

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